PAKISTAN WILL BEAT INDIA IN ANY WAR

   PAKISTAN IS ALL POWERFUL

India has been threatening war against Pakistan but there is no war in which India can ever beat Pakistan. No Pakistani is afraid of war: Everyone is brave enough to put up a status online asking for war. As long as I, as a Pakistani, do not have to fight in it, I support every war.

If it makes me feel better to upload a cover photo with the Pakistani flag, why should I care about helping to create social conditions where thousands of people can die? I do not even care about causing accidents on the road after painting both my car’s windscreens green and white.

In many ways, I am also a soldier. I have waged a war against India for a decade in Facebook comments. I am particularly proud of all the times I have referred to ‘India’ as ‘End ya’. In every cricket match after India loses a wicket I tweet the following: “In dia? Nahee, out dia.”

Do you think a country full of people who can come up with such hilarious puns can be defeated by a country where Katrina Kaif can win the Smita Patil Memorial Award?

Pakistan will win any war against India. World War I, World II, The American Civil War; we have never lost any war against India. In fact the worst Pakistani performance in a war was by the actors in Bilal Lashari’s Waar.
Even there we beat India. Anyone who saw the movie Border and thought no one can make a worse propaganda movie underestimated the power of Pakistanis.

There is a reason why we have the best spy agency in the world. Every single boy in Pakistan is trained in spy missions. Trying to pick up a girl from her house in Karachi without her mother noticing is nothing short of a James Bond mission. You have to disguise yourself as the driver, strategically park the car at an angle where her mother cannot spot it from the roof and if anybody approaches at a moment’s notice be ready to scream out, “Khuda ki kasam behan hay meri.”

For years the WWE has tried to warn us of the nefarious designs of India’s spy agency by screaming out to us ‘RAW is WAR’ but we never listened. We were blinded by uncle Aman’s daughter Asha and steamrolled by the Samjhota express.
Too long have we danced to the beat of India on all our mehndis and dholkis; too long have we asked our barbers to give us the Shahrukh Khan haircut; too long have we tried hiding our bellies in Salman Khan endorsed white ugly vests.

It is time we say enough is enough and engage in an all-out war against India. Every Pakistani is equal to 60 Indians and 2+2 = 22.

We will beat India on the cricket ground. We will beat India at the border. We will go to Mars and beat their satellite there. So what if we do not even get water in the most posh area of Karachi? Beliefs are stronger than science and I believe we will win. I am sure Agha Waqar can build us a satellite that runs on water.

Nawaz Sharif will beat Narendra Modi in an eating contest. Shahid Afridi will beat Sachin Tendulkar in a ‘will not retire’ contest. Humayun Saeed will beat Shahrukh Khan in a ‘will still play a 20 year old in movies’ contest. Atif Aslam will beat Himesh Reshamiya in an auto tuning contest. Bilal Khan will beat Katrina Kaif in a more fake British accent contest. Imran Khan will beat Arvind Kejriwaal in a ‘trust me, we can still win’ delusion. Mubasher Lucman will beat Arnab Goswami in a shouting match. Every memon will beat Bappi Larri in wearing more gold in public. Hamza Ali Abbasi will beat Subramanian Swamy in jingoism. Every wall being used as a public toilet in Pakistan will defeat the Swachh Bharat movement.

We are the more hip choice for people worldwide. Pakistan – the new and improved India. We can build six Taj Mahals – even if that means spending no money on building schools and hospitals. If it means being better than India then I am sure all people dying from lack of adequate healthcare will understand.

India better not challenge us to another war. There is no way they can defeat us. We will have applications pending for visas for other countries. Every Pakistani will be willing to fly a plane over India, all the way to Australia for safe asylum.

India cannot isolate us from the West. We are the West. Every geographer in the world will tell you that Pakistan is closer to the West than India.

This satire was first printed in the The Express Tribune Pakistan on 03 Oct 2016

FAKE RARE ITEMS LIKE XIAOMI POWERBANKS

 CAVEAT EMPTOR: LET THE BUYER BE WARNED

I purchased an Mi Powerbank online from this company-Ebazar Ninjas
Order ID - OID209279
→ Product - EB 10400 MH Powerbank
→ POD No. - 700709789
→ Logistic Partner - HOLISOL
MI Powerbanks are rarely available, so fraudsters make a killing selling fakes. I noticed the following deficiencies/ discrepancies:
1. The original is branded mi.com; this has xiaomi.com
2. The original cable has no dented dots on the plug-ins; this has them, two each per side.
3. The original cable has no logo printed on the plug-in; this has.
4. The original cable has a guide in English-this had NONE.
5. The original cable has a beige slot-in guide; this is white.
6. This device can be charged by just plugging in the same cable into the micro USB slot. How can a device recharge itself from its own batteries?

I saw this video-
 
I will never buy even a matchbox from this company.
Friends, read what I have written and be advised accordingly. They are fraudsters.

PM NARENDRA MODI'S POK MASTERSTROKE OR WHAT?

PM NARENDRA MODI'S BRILLIANT PLOY REGARDING PAKISTAN OCCUPIED KASHMIR

Modi's Outstanding Gambit

The road connecting China's Gwadar Port passes through Baluchistan. The issue here is that Pakistan, with the help of the Chinese Army, is killing Baluchistan's citizens. China is also spending billions of dollars for Pakistan.  China has just realised it has committed a big blunder by blocking India's entry to NSG.

China is fighting for its rights in the South China Sea, something abstruse and laughable. NaMo maintained a meaningful silence in the last two years and gained the confidence of many countries around the World. Now, while supporting the Baluchistan Freedom movement, NaMo also claimed that Pakistan is illegally occupying PoK which is an integral part of India (they could have vacated it in 1971 when India peacefully returned the area captured by Indian Army in 1971 war).

After taking over as PM, NaMo, in the last two years has been continuously striving to make India a Member of the NSG but China has deliberately blocked the proposal every time.

Moreover, China is supporting Pakistan to weaken India and constructing many projects in Baluchistan for its own benefit.

In the international court, China has lost its rights in the South China sea matter and is badly in need of India's help in this matter.

China sent its External Affairs Minister to Delhi to seek India's help in the above issue,with a message that India's entry in NSG is not a closed chapter yet.

NaMo took advantage of the situation and set his own conditions:

1) China has to unconditionally support India's entry into NSG.
2) PoK is integral part of India & Pakistan has to vacate immediately.
3) China has to standby India's decision to liberate Balochistan from Pakistan.

In effect, China has come with a plea for seeking support on China's right on Gwadar Port and assuring help re India's entry into NSG as a quid pro quo.
NaMo said forget NSG, support us in the PoK issue. The entire world is greatly appreciating how NaMo moved the dice. Possibly, this means that NaMo has sarcastically said to China, "forget Gwadar Port." China is sandwiched. The situation NaMo created in just 2 years which was impossible by the successive Governments that ruled this country for 60 years...!!!!

Modi.... This is Modi Style...they say!

Article posted by Arvind Sharma and edited by me.

THE SECOND COMMANDMENT AND CATHOLICISM

THE BYZANTINE ICONOCLASM

The Second Commandment

The Ten Commandments are listed twice in the Holy Bible, first at Exodus 20:1–17, and then at Deuteronomy 5:4–21. Both versions state that God inscribed them on two stone tablets, which he gave to Moses on Mount Sinai.

The Second Commandment dictates: Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image.

Iconoclasm, Greek for ‘breaker of icons', is the deliberate destruction within a culture of the culture's own religious icons and other symbols or monuments, usually for religious or political motives. People who engage in or support iconoclasm are called iconoclasts, a term that has come to be applied figuratively to any person who breaks or disdains established dogmata or conventions.

Christian worship by the sixth century had developed a clear belief in the intercession of saints. This belief was also influenced by a concept of a hierarchy of sanctity, with the Trinity at its pinnacle, followed by the Virgin Mary, the Theotokos (God-bearer) or Meter Theou (Mother of God) in Greek, the saints, living holy men, women, and spiritual elders, followed by the rest of humanity. Thus, in order to obtain blessings or divine favour, early Christians would often pray or ask an intermediary, such as the saints or the Theotokos, to intercede on their behalf with Christ. A strong sacramentality and belief in the importance of physical presence also joined the belief in the intercession of saints with the use of relics and holy images (or icons) in early Christian practices.

Believers would, therefore, make pilgrimages to places sanctified by the physical presence of Christ or prominent saints and martyrs, such as the site of the Holy Sepulchre in Jerusalem. Relics, or holy objects which were a part of the remains, or had come into contact with, Christ, the Virgin or a saint, were also widely utilised in Christian practices at this time. Relics, a firmly embedded part of veneration by this period, provided physical presence of the divine but were not reproducible (an original relic was required), and still usually required believers to undertake a pilgrimage or have contact with somebody who had.

Byzantine Iconoclasm refers to two periods in the history of the Byzantine Empire (726 – 787 AD) & (814 - 842) when the use of religious images or icons was opposed by religious and imperial authorities within the Eastern Church and the temporal imperial hierarchy. According to the traditional view, Byzantine Iconoclasm constituted a ban on religious images by Emperor Leo III and continued under his successors. It was accompanied by widespread destruction of images and persecution of supporters of the veneration of images. The Western church remained firmly in support of the use of images throughout the period, and the whole episode widened the growing divergence between the Eastern and Western traditions in what was still a unified church.

The use and abuse of images had greatly increased during this period and had generated a growing opposition among many in the church. Images in the form of mosaics and paintings were widely used in churches, homes and other places.

The rise of Islam in the 7^th century had also caused some consideration of the use of holy images. Early Islamic belief stressed the impropriety of iconic representation. Traditional explanations for Byzantine iconoclasm have sometimes focused on the importance of Islamic prohibitions against images influencing Byzantine thought. The prestige of Islamic military successes in the 7^th and 8^th centuries that motivated Byzantine Christians to adopt the Islamic position of rejecting and destroying idolatrous images.

The Second Commandment, among many other issues, saw the emergence of Martin Luther (10 November 1483 – 18 February 1546) a German professor of theology, composer, priest and monk as a seminal figure in the Protestant Reformation. Luther taught that salvation and, subsequently, eternal life are not earned by good deeds but are received only as the free gift of God's grace through the believer's faith in Jesus Christ as redeemer from sin. His theology challenged the authority and office of the Pope by teaching that the Bible is the only source of divinely revealed knowledge from God. 

When you enter a Catholic Church or even a residence, the most prominent visible figure is that of Jesus on the Cross. How does this jell with the Second Commandment?

The Parsis in WWI - The Battle Of The Somme

Westminster Abbey Service Honours Parsi/Irani Soldiers

A service was held in remembrance of the 100th Anniversary of the Battle of Somme 1916-2016. Many Indian soldiers sacrificed their lives during this devastating war and 19 Parsi soldiers died on the battlefield of Somme.

On July 1, the British Government held a full service at Westminster Abbey to commemorate lives lost and the unparalleled courage shown, by those who fought at the Battle of Somme in France during World War I.

Few know, that in this terrible battle, a million soldiers died fighting in service of their country. Many Indian soldiers sacrificed their lives during this devastating war and 19 Parsi soldiers lost their lives on the battlefield of Somme. The Parsi Battalion was the only fighting force in British India that was granted the same status as the British army.

But it all seemed to be so far out in time and place that one paid little attention to the upcoming event. Then, quite out of the blue, I received an email from Col. Sohrab Rusi Dalal (son of Rusi and Roshan Dalal, ZTFE, UK). He was invited to participate and read a passage at the National Remembrance service to mark the 100^th anniversary of the Battle of Somme, at Westminster Abbey.

Col. Dalal wanted a passage, a letter or a write up that he could read on the Parsis to mark their presence at the battle of Somme.I knew of only one person who had compiled and chronicled the history of Parsi Irani soldiers who gave their lives in World War I. I turned to Marzban J. Giara’s recently published book, The Contribution of the Parsi Community during the First World War (1914-1918).

There I discovered the names of the Parsi Irani soldiers who fought in the many theatres of the Great War, the most hallowed being the battlefield of Somme. In the book compiled by Giara I found just what I wanted, a moving poem addressed to “Ye sons of Zal and Rustam” a reference to the great warriors in the epic poem, Shahname.

The poem, composed by the eminent Parsi scholar and author Rustom B. Paymaster, and found in his book The Voice of the East on The Great War was published by Giara in his book.

Giara is a determined chronicler of community history and heritage and we thank him for it and the Sorabji Burjorji Garda College Trust Navsari that sponsored the book.

This poem in honour of the Parsi Irani soldiers, was read by Col. Sohrab Rusi Dalal and was the first of 39 pieces read out at the Westminster Abbey service, a moving tribute of remembrance, of those members of our community who gave their lives during the Great War so that we may live in freedom.

For the record, the soldiers of the Parsi Battalion, according to Giara, carried with them a small Khordeh Avesta, which was given to them before they left the shores of Bombay and before every mission they would perform their Kusti before going into action.

This poem was composed by Shams-Ul-Ulma Dastur Dr. Darab Peshotan Sanjana, High Priest of the Parsis, who exhorted them to take up arms for their King and the Empire (vide The Times of India, 12th August 1914). This poem is from The Voice of the East on The Great War, by Rustom B. Paymaster, Bombay 1916.

Ye sons of Zal and Rustom, now’s the time,

For you to show your loyal zeal sublime.

Take Mazda’s name, and quick gird up your loins,

Up! Up and do what duty now enjoins,

Ye Parsees, sooth, the very life-blood owe,

Which in your pure Iranian veins doth flow,

Your flesh and bones and skin, your freedom full,

Nor pearls nor diamonds have such wealth contain.

So, Parsees awake! When called for fight prepare,

Unfurl your Gavian standard in the air!

Fling the light saddle on your charger’s back,

Not one, when called to arms, must spirit lack.

Ay, walk with British soldiers pace to pace,

March to the battlefield with manly grace

Draw your proud ranks by your brave ruler’s side,

Unmindful in what future maybe-tide-

What matters it if o’er you mountains slip!

Or foe men’s hateful Swords your bodies rip?

What matters it if you in sea are drowned,

Or in the air you’re shot to plunge aground?

To your great fame brave deeds will e’er rebound,

Return or die with lasting glory crowned

In just and righteous cause your sword unsheathe,

To future times your brilliant fame bequeaths.

FIROZA PUNTHAKEY MISTREE: Jam-e-Jamshed Weekly, Sunday, July 24, 2016

AMAZING SELF-PROTECTION DEVICE FOR WOMEN

New Military Flashlight Every Girl Needs to Know About

Every woman knows the feeling: You’re walking through a parking lot alone. It’s really dark out, and you’re getting eyed by some strange man lurking in the distance.

When that happens, there are four things you should have in your possession:

• Keys to clutch between your knuckles
• Pepper spray
• A personal alarm on your keychain
• A super powerful flashlight

The first three make sense, but few women consider the importance of the flashlight. Here’s why that’s a big mistake.

The first three items often take time to enable – time you may not have. Will you be able to get your keys between your fingers and nail a good punch before an attacker stops you? Can you take the safety off your pepper spray and aim it in the right direction in time? How easily can you activate the “screamer” alarm on your keychain – and will anyone even pay attention to it?

Don’t get us wrong, these items are all great to have, but a flashlight is another essential. It can be used to deter a lurker by exposing him in the shadows, blinding an attacker close up, or as a blunt object during a struggle.
A new tactical flashlight called the G700 has been getting a lot of attention in this area. It’s made out of nearly indestructible Military-Grade Aircraft Aluminum Housing, runs on only 3 AAA batteries, and is able to light the way to safety with 700 blinding lumens of light. It also houses a super cool ZOOM feature (demonstrated in the photo above), an "SOS mode" to signal for help, as well as a "strobe mode" that produces a pulsating frequency to disorient a threat within milliseconds!

Have a teen or college-age daughter? This is an essential tool that can give them (and you) some peace of mind.

From police to self-defense instructors, countless experts agree that a flashlight is a powerful safety tool. But unlike regular LED lights you’ll find at hardware stores, the G700 uses recently released military technology that is now available to the public. This allows it to be super powerful, very durable, and incredibly lightweight, so you can bring it anywhere you go.

Orders are currently pouring in for the G700 because the company announced a bargain 75% discount on purchases for new customers—while supplies last!
Whether you’re single or married, teenager or young adult, college student or professional woman – it’s important to protect yourself and the people you love. Having the right tools allows you to do that.

THE TOP FIVE JAPANESE WHISKIES

LEADING 12 YO JAPANESE WHISKIES IN THE USA

The top five of Japan’s 12-year-old whiskies are: Yamazaki, Hakushu, Nikka Taketsuru, Nikka Miyagikyo and Hibiki. Drink them as you like, but note that the Japanese typically add a dash (or a lot) of water. I use between 5 and 15 drops of water, using a pipette or drinking straw. I like Yamazaki the most.I have included the Yoichi 10-year-old as a very close 6th.

1. Suntory Yamazaki

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Sweetest: The first seriously marketed whisky from the distillery that started it all: Yamazaki 12-year-old. This is the classic, and for good reason. It’s light. It’s floral. It’s delicious. For what you’re getting, it’s reasonably priced. On the nose, one gets hints of zest and honey, and the palate, smooth and sweet, brings flavors of citrus with some vanilla oakiness. If you have a snobbish friend who insists on Scotch, a glass of Yamazaki should be the first class in a course of conversion to the Japanese path.  

2. Suntory Hakushu

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Smokiest: Hakushu, Suntory’s third American release, comes in a green bottle (a rarity among most clear-bottled Japanese whiskies) that hints at its “green” flavor profile: leaves and fruits, particularly pear. Marketed as the “fresh” whisky, Hakushu 12-year-old comes from the forests at the base of the Southern Japanese Alps. However, you’d be forgiven if you mistake this for an Islay malt. Even thoroughbred tasters often fail to separate the two. The use of peated barley, imported from Scotland, gives the whisky a smoky nose that suggests seaside origins; then you taste the delicate whisky, and find yourself transported to the forests of Japan.

3. Nikka Miyagikyo

 

 

The Most Surprising: When you nose this whisky, it releases little by the way of aroma. It takes ten minutes to settle and a second sniff yields heavy doses of toffee and caramel. The taste — full of strong, sweet vanilla — mimicks the nose’s form: slow to build, but impressive at its peak.Very classy finish.

4. Nikka Taketsuru

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Smoothest: Interestingly, this is a vatted (a blend of single malts) versus blended whisky, brought over to the United States for the first time just last year. It combines 12-year-old malts from Nikka’s Yoichi and Miyagikyo distilleries. The darkest of the five whiskies (though still light, as far as whiskies go), the Taketsuru wows your taste with its even balance and smooth finish. On the nose, you get hints of vanilla, apple and cinnamon (apple pie). However, honey dominates the palate — so much so, in fact, that you feel like you are drinking straight from a honeycomb. The finish is rather short. 

5. Suntory Hibiki

The Sexiest Bottle: Housed in a distinct, multi-faceted, corked (!) bottle, or decanter, this Suntory whisky looks like something pulled from Noel’s personal bar. Although the nose is a bit sharp, the Hibiki gains points for using whisky aged in Mizunara, a rare Japanese oak, as well as casks formerly used to hold Japanese plum liqueur. Like the Nikka Miyagikyo, the Hibiki is rich and thick, bordering on syrupy. The taste mirrors the honey and vanilla of other offerings, but with an oily texture and small notes of fruit. An excellent blend. 

6. Yoichi 10 YO

 

A very well made single malt from Japan, Yoichi is the jewel in Nikka's crown, their 10 year old offering notes of vanilla and fruit.  Nose: Plenty of fruit notes - peach stands out in particular, ripe, vibrant and subtly floral. Then there's rich vanilla custard, peat smoke and a hint of nutmeg spice. Palate: Oily and sweet, with peat smoke following swiftly afterwards. Light oak and developing fruit notes beneath. Finish: Appealing oak lasts on the finish.